Monday, November 24, 2014

The Randy Randomness Hour (Pilot Episode Part 3)

The Randy Randomness Hour
Pilot Episode Part 3

Coming back from the commercial break, the camera pans through the San Antonio crowd and then goes to Randy Randomness who is comfortably sitting in his chair playing on his own Nintendo 3DS. He can be heard laughing while the jazz band play their tune. Allen Armadillo can be seen eating a Waffle Taco from Taco Bell. The Producer points at Randy and he puts away the 3DS. 

Randy Randomness: We're back and it's time to bring out our guests! Maybe not all 3 at once but we like being creative around here, so who's up first? Do you know who's coming out here first, Allen? 

Allen Armadillo: *eating his Waffle Taco* I'm as... clueless as you are! I'm preoccupied too, so... *burps* ...yeah! 

Randy: Eating on the job? How lazy of you! Nah! Just kidding! Anyway, here comes out first guest! The very first guest to be interviewed on The Randy Randomness Hour! It's... John Doe? Who?

John Doe, a random guy wearing a yellow Pac-Man T-shirt and having a brown afro hairstyle, walks out on stage looking like he just woke up from a good nap. John Doe lets out a yawn and then takes a seat on a nice cozy living room couch next to Randy. Randy shakes John's hand.

Randy: Welcome to The Randy Randomness Hour, Mr. ... Whoever-You-Are! 

John: I'm John Doe.

Randy: Yeah, but who are you? What do you do? Are you a Pac-Man fan? How much do you game? 

John: I've won many local Pac-Man tournaments here in San Antonio! 

Randy: Oh, you have? Do you believe that, Allen?

Allen: *on his cell phone* Sorry! I'm talking to my agent! 

Randy: Boy, you're a lot of help! So... Pac-Man tournament winner, huh? Got any proof of that, John Doe?

John: *gets out a certificate and shows it to everybody* Here's my proof! 3-time Singles Champion and 2-time Doubles Champion! Gotta love Pac-Man! 

Randy: You know what? My brain hurts! There are just... so many of you guys! John Doe of San Antonio? John Doe of Kansas City? John Doe of Los Angeles? C'MON! 

John: I guess we're one big band of brothers! 

Randy: Don't be the funny one here! I'm the funny one! 

Allen: Excuse me, but I think I'm pretty funny too! 

Randy: You got an F in Clown School back in the day! You're too bland to be funny! 

John: Ever been to a PAX event? It's really cool! You get to meet all sorts of people! 

Randy: PAX East is Boston? PAX Prime in Seattle? PAX South in Austin? What does that have to do with you, dude?

John: I won a gaming tournament there too! In Seattle! 

Randy: Now you're just making stuff up! John Doe can't be your real name! I'm done interviewing you! How come I've never heard of you before? Bring in the next guest! 

The 2nd guest abruptly comes out on stage and showboats in front of the San Antonio crowd. Dressed up as a hybrid between a navy ship captain and a superhero, Captain Obvious appears and runs to the couch. He stands on the couch next to John Doe (who doesn't care) and poses like a superhero. Randy Randomness looks unimpressed while Allen Armadillo can be heard laughing in the background. 

Allen: It's the Pilot Episode and you already have your hands full! Have fun with this character! 

Randy: Oh boy... I can't bear to think how you got your name! Introduce yourself to San Antonio! 

Captain Obvious: Have no fear, citizens of San Antonio! It is I, Captain Obvious, and I am here to provide you with information that you probably already know! Pi, or 3.14, is NOT the same as an apple pie! There are normally 364 days in a year minus leap years! You cannot compare Super Mario games to Call of Duty games! 

Randy: *facepalm* I'll happily agree with that last fact, but the other ones were unnecessary! Okay... Questions... Are you really a superhero, or are you just pretending to be one?

Obvious: I always go by the book! I read the book "How To Be A Superhero For Dummies"!

Randy: Did we really scrape the bottom of the barrel when it comes to guests? Um... Captain Obvious, have you saved anyone's life?

Obvious: Obviously not! I leave that up to cops and firefighters! 

Randy: Have you done anything significant?

Obvious: I memorized an entire encyclopedia once! 

Randy: No! Anything significant related to video games?

Obvious: Does playing Parappa The Rappa count? 

Randy: Oh, that game? What did you like about it?

Obvious: *gets out of his seat and points to the crowd* May we rap as a dynamic duo, Mr. John Doe, sir?

John: *jumps up* I'm down with that! Word up! 

Obvious: Now you guys in the crowd can rap along with us! We may not be Will Smith, MC Hammer or Vanilla Ice but we can break it down right here and now! 

Allen: Lighten up, Randy! Join in on the fun! 

Obvious: Now let's ad lib as we go along! Ready?

"This show is oh so sweet, so don't be sour!
Time to sit back and relax! It's The Randy Randomness Hour!"

John: "I ain't got nothing good to say, but hey, 
I'm here! I'm having fun! On the way back home, I call shotgun!"

Allen: "On this show I work with a squirrel who's really nutty! 
I don't mind, though, 'cuz he's my buddy!"

Randy: "These interviews have gone so bad,
but sad to say, the show must go on!
You know what? I still kick butt! 
A BUTTON! SQUARE BUTTON! PAUSE! *pauses* Onto the next one!"

Crowd: "TIME TO HAVE MORE FUN! WOOOOO!!!"

Randy: *dances on stage* Well, now I feel better! That wasn't so obvious! We'll take a commercial break and then we'll bring out our last guest, Chef Cinnamonman! Oh my! Apple pie!

Allen: Captain Obvious mentioned apple pie! 

Randy: I love apple pie! I cannot lie! 

*commercial break*                                            

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